{"id":2140,"date":"2016-12-06T08:04:54","date_gmt":"2016-12-06T08:04:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.lastingconnections.net\/?p=2140"},"modified":"2016-12-06T08:04:54","modified_gmt":"2016-12-06T08:04:54","slug":"first-date-questions-answers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sameerasullivan.com\/first-date-questions-answers\/","title":{"rendered":"First Date Questions And Answers"},"content":{"rendered":"

First Date Questions And Answers<\/h1>\n

\"firstLet\u2019s talk a little more in depth about that all-important first date<\/strong>.<\/span><\/p>\n

My clients often ask me for help and guidance on everything from what to wear to who should pay. \u00a0And because it\u2019s something that can cause even the most seasoned of singles to get anxious or nervous about, I\u2019ve decided it\u2019s best to compile the most frequently asked questions, along with my answers.<\/span><\/p>\n

After all, first impressions are everything. \u00a0And if you happen to meet \u201cthe one\u201d, you want to make sure they call you back for a second night out. \u00a0Good luck!<\/span><\/p>\n

Question: During Introductions\u2026Handshake, Hug, or Nothing?<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

Do whatever you are most comfortable with. \u00a0If you\u2019re a hugger, then offer a hug. \u00a0If you\u2019re a hand shaker, extend the hand. \u00a0It\u2019s okay to not be quite sure what to do, just don\u2019t pretend to be something you\u2019re not. \u00a0Always remember that on the first date, you\u2019re showing and telling the other person who you are (and hopefully they\u2019re returning the favor). \u00a0You don\u2019t have to be perfect\u2026just sincere and genuine. \u00a0And if in the end it turns out you love to give hugs and they don\u2019t even want to clink glasses over dinner, then maybe that\u2019s a sign this isn\u2019t the right person for you.<\/span><\/p>\n

Question: Which topics should be considered taboo or off limits?<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

A first date is a time to establish a genuine, positive connection. \u00a0Steer clear of the heavier subjects, and if they come up, only skim the surface before moving on. \u00a0Don\u2019t get too heavy into politics, religion, or other polarizing subjects; verbal sparring can be fun, but I recommend saving the debates for after you\u2019ve established a positive connection. \u00a0Until you know a person more intimately, it can be confusing and even a little intimidating to have heated discussions, as you don\u2019t yet know the other person well enough to recognize the difference between when they\u2019re arguing, debating, or just plain angry.<\/span><\/p>\n

And never, ever go in depth about past relationships on a first date. \u00a0Doing this can leave many impressions\u2026and none of them are positive. \u00a0It can lead your date to believe you\u2019re still emotionally tied to your ex. \u00a0It can stir up jealousy or insecurity. \u00a0And most important of all\u2026a first date is a chance for a fresh start; but by discussing an ex, you risk ruining a blank slate with all the red marks from your old ledger.<\/span><\/p>\n

Question: What is a good venue for a first date?<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

While people often try to come up with things that are considered \u2018fun\u2019 or \u2018different\u2019 for a first date, we actually recommend an old fashioned approach. \u00a0The idea of zip lining over the Grand Canyon sounds fun, but it doesn\u2019t really give you the chance to get to know your date.<\/span><\/p>\n

Nothing beats a nice wine bar, or a lunch or dinner date. Pick a place with \u00a0pleasant ambiance. \u00a0Not too crowded, and not too loud. \u00a0You want an atmosphere that encourages intimate conversation, where you have the chance to relax and be yourself. \u00a0A first date should never involve inviting your date to your home for dinner, or anywhere else for that matter that has the two of you completely alone for extended periods of time; this opens the door wide for misunderstandings, missed signals, and misfires. Inviting a date for dinner on a 2nd date in your home can also be a disaster. Stay away from that idea until after the 5th date! <\/span><\/p>\n

Remember\u2026the first date is the chance to see if there is a connection<\/em>. \u00a0The fewer distractions, the better.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"first-date-3\"Question: What Should I Wear?<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

The wardrobe question is probably the most common question I\u2019m asked when it comes to first dates. \u00a0Every person is different, but there are a few basic rules that apply no matter who you are or where you\u2019re going:<\/span><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Less is more<\/em>, ladies; this is not the time to flash a ton of skin. \u00a0Too much cleavage or too much leg can really give a man the wrong idea about what you\u2019re looking for.<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>And gentlemen, be polished and professional. \u00a0Nothing with stains, wrinkles, or holes; don\u2019t care if it\u2019s your \u2018lucky red shirt\u2019. \u00a0It doesn\u2019t belong on a first date.<\/em><\/span><\/li>\n
  3. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Nothing with offensive or controversial logos or slogans. \u00a0You don\u2019t know this person yet; a first date is the time to make a good first impression, and you never know what might trigger a negative reaction. \u00a0It\u2019s always better to play it safe.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Question: What\u2019s some good first date etiquette<\/a>?<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

      \n
    1. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Be on time.<\/strong> \u00a0Might seem obvious, but you\u2019d be amazed how many people arrive late for a first date.<\/span><\/li>\n
    2. \"what\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Put the phone away<\/strong>; you want your date to feel like you\u2019re interested. \u00a0Constantly texting others gives the impression that you\u2019d rather be elsewhere.<\/span><\/li>\n
    3. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>No shoveling or slurping your food<\/strong>, if you please. Remember that scene from \u2018Beauty and the Beast\u2019 where Belle is first teaching the Beast how to eat\u2026? \u00a0Yeah, this isn\u2019t a good time for a moment like that. \u00a0I promise your date is not going to find it attractive if you\u2019re wearing half your dinner and slurping the rest.<\/span><\/li>\n
    4. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>Go easy on the alcohol.<\/strong> \u00a0You may think you\u2019re cute or hilarious when drunk\u2026but I guarantee mostly you\u2019ll just appear sloppy and immature if you don\u2019t know how to manage your drinking properly. \u00a0This isn\u2019t college any more, and dates are no longer impressed by how many shots you can handle.<\/span><\/li>\n
    5. \u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>At the end of the night, the man should pay on the first date.<\/strong> \u00a0It\u2019s just good manners. \u00a0Plus, it eliminates the inevitably awkward silence when the check arrives.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      Question: To kiss\u2026or not to kiss?<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

      Like a lot of PDA-related questions, the answer always depends on the personal preferences of the individual. \u00a0If it\u2019s not something you\u2019re comfortable with, then don\u2019t do it. \u00a0If your date goes in for a kiss, and you\u2019re not feeling it\u2026speak up. \u00a0Set a healthy boundary. \u00a0A first kiss should be a wonderful thing; not something you\u2019re questioning five seconds after your date drives away.<\/span><\/p>\n

      Also, some people have a hard time separating physical intimacy from emotional attachment; if you fall into that category, I usually recommend holding off on kissing until you\u2019ve had a chance to get to know your date a little better as a person. \u00a0Like any kind of physical intimacy, kissing can lead to confusion. \u00a0It can be hard to know if the butterflies you\u2019re feeling after a date are because you felt connected to the person, or simply because they were a good kisser (and there is a difference\u2026physical chemistry will only get you so far).<\/span><\/p>\n

      Trust me\u2026if it\u2019s the right person, the kiss will happen when it\u2019s meant to happen. \u00a0There\u2019s no need to rush or force the issue.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

      First Date Questions And Answers Let\u2019s talk a little more in depth about that all-important first date. My clients often ask me for help and guidance on everything from what to wear to who should pay. \u00a0And because it\u2019s something that can cause even the most seasoned of singles to get anxious or nervous about, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[16,20],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nFirst Date Questions And Answers - Lasting Connections<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Tips for that all important first date provided by our matchmaking expert, Sameera Sullivan. 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