One of the things that makes New York City so charming is the sense that it\u2019s one big melting pot of cultures and social stratospheres. If you take a walk through Central Park, or ride on the Subway, you\u2019ll meet just about every kind of person you can imagine, from all walks of life.<\/p>\n
And as part of that melting pot, New York City is a place where many wealthy people in particular come to live their lives. How could it not be? With Wall Street and headquarters of many of the great banks and other corporations of the world making their home here, it only makes sense that those who have ambition and have achieved success would establish their lives in a place with such endless opportunity.<\/p>\n
Celebrities and entrepreneurs have even been known to say they prefer life in The Big Apple, because it\u2019s so big and so populous they feel like they have a chance to truly \u2018disappear\u2019 and experience the anonymity they can\u2019t find anywhere else.<\/p>\n
Most of our elite clients are from this specific culture and way of life, and one of the problems they are most worried about is getting ensnared by the proverbial gold digger. In fact, that\u2019s often why they walk through our door in the first place; they want help ensuring they stay away from someone who only wants to marry them for their hard-earned money. And it\u2019s a legitimate concern; we\u2019ve also had plenty of experience with these same gold diggers coming through our door in hopes of becoming part of our private registry.<\/p>\n
Good news is we have a thorough screening process to ensure such men and women don\u2019t find their way into our registry, but where does that leave everyone else who isn\u2019t working with a firm like ours? If you\u2019re a successful single man or woman living in New York City, do you have extra cause for concern? Or is it all just an illusion and it\u2019s no different than any other part of the world?<\/p>\n
First, unfortunately it\u2019s not just in your head. Gold diggers will go where they know the money is, and while New York City isn\u2019t the only destination on their list, it\u2019s one of only four or five places in the world where they\u2019re most inclined to go.<\/p>\n
But that doesn\u2019t mean you\u2019re at risk every minute of the day. It\u2019s actually easier than you might think to spot someone who\u2019s only after you for your money, and if you can keep these couple of tips in mind when meeting new people, you should be fine.<\/p>\n
1. Try not to be too flashy with your wealth. Of course, there\u2019s nothing wrong with enjoying the fruits of your labor and having the finer things in your life, but you have to be careful with how you flash that credit card around; we\u2019ve found in general gold diggers are watching for the people who are the flashiest with their money. If you enjoy revving the engine of that new sports car, or want to show off the new Rolex watch, that\u2019s fine; just be prepared for the reality that it\u2019s like putting a banner over your head inviting gold diggers to come and talk to you. So memorize the rest of our tips to make sure even if they do come talk to you, they don\u2019t succeed in catching you up in their web.<\/p>\n
2. No matter how charming\u2026no matter how attractive\u2026there\u2019s a superficiality to gold diggers that will come out. And if you\u2019re watching for it, you will see it. For example, if he or she is constantly valuing you based on what you\u2019re giving them, rather than simply appreciating you for your company, that\u2019s a huge red flag. If they seem more entranced by brand names and designer labels than by asking you about your day or listening to your deepest thoughts and feelings, or if they\u2019d rather go shopping than go spend a day holding hands with you in Central Park, or if they\u2019re constantly looking for upgrades \u2013 won\u2019t fly anything but first class, always want the penthouse suite in the hotel \u2013 and pout when they don\u2019t get their way\u2026\u2026it\u2019s time to run away as fast as you can. That isn\u2019t normal behavior.<\/p>\n
3. Watch how they treat wait staff and others when you\u2019re with them. This is a good tip in general but is also good for gold diggers so it\u2019s an important reminder. You don\u2019t want to be with someone who is rude\/mean\/cruel to the people simply trying to earn a living serving your dinner or cleaning your home. That implies all kinds of things are wrong with their inner character.<\/p>\n
4. If you find yourself spending money faster than you ever have before in your life, and the only thing that\u2019s changed is the significant other you\u2019re now attached to, that\u2019s something to look at. Of course, it\u2019s normal to want to impress a new love, but if month after month you\u2019re finding that your budget is all out of whack, you need to take a long, hard look at why.<\/p>\n
5. Make sure you value yourself fully before you become part of a relationship; this way you can be sure you won\u2019t feel pressured to use your money to please your partner and earn their love. No matter what the balance in your bank account, you deserve someone who loves you for precisely who you are. We often advise our wealthier clients to in fact do the opposite of what you might be tempted to do when in the throes of a new relationship; refrain from spending excessive amounts of money until the relationship has stood the test of time. This can really give you a sense of whether or not a new partner is with you for the right or the wrong reasons.<\/p>\n
6. Find a partner who has something going for themselves already. In other words, be wary of the man or woman who has no career, and seems to just sort of be waiting around for someone to come along and take care of them. It doesn\u2019t have to be a career that earns them a lot of money\u2026it just needs to be a career. Or a passion. Or a focus. In other words, something that gets them out of bed each morning.<\/p>\n
Ultimately, having money creates a unique set of problems for those looking for love, and those problems will follow you no matter where you go. But living in a place like New York City can also have its\u2019 upsides, since having such a large population of wealthy people to engage with can also mean you have more access to people within your own network than someone living in a smaller city or suburb does.<\/p>\n
Just remember: while not everyone whose bank account is less impressive than yours is out to steal your money, it\u2019s never a bad idea to keep your eyes open. Be self-aware. And if you meet someone new, it\u2019s ok to do your research; ask around and see if anyone else has met them, and if so, learn whether their experiences\/impressions are good or bad. Also, don\u2019t hesitate to look them up online and view their social media pages and what kind(s) of content they share there; that will tell you a lot about who they are and what their overall values are.<\/p>\n
Happy Hunting!<\/p>\n
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Need to find the right match to date? Talk to our New York match experts<\/a>\u00a0today!<\/p>\n